Girls & Guys

Girls are hard to please and after years of constant mishap even girls pretty well know that. Trust me, if you haven’t met or seen a girl who hasn’t admitted it, you’ve just not met a girl who’s being frank or one who has realized the truth of it yet.

However I would say there is actually a “but”, a big “B….U…T”. First of all I am pretty sure there is a number of you laughing or even just giving a sarcastic smile  since you’re seeing a guy talk about girls. Well as a fellow compatriot I would definitely like to share my experiences with you guys, and to the cute girls reading this I’d just like to say “Hey all you beautiful people.”. Ok before I go on I’d just like to tell you this might get sexist at places so don’t kill me in advance. Basically it’s supposed to. It’s a thesis based on the clear majority which is personally experienced.

Okay so let’s now talk about this. Clearly one of the main reasons women are so complicated is because well there are literally so many types of women. Now I bet now my side’s going like “Hey they are different types of guys too man shut up!”. Well Elmer Fudd let me tell you that even though you’re right you’re kinda not as well. You see the thing is no matter how many types of men there are personality-wise or charm-wise or even the guy’s a calisthenic pro, the thing is that if a cute girl approaches him and wants to go out with him, like let’s say she gives him her number. She could also be completely upfront with him,by the way I recently saw this girl say that they are more upfront than guys are. Basically the point is that no matter how she does it a guy is most probably gonna accept.

Well that girl claimed that particular point on behalf of girls. Well I would like to claim something on behalf of us guys, we guys are less picky. This is true no matter how much we go like “oh no that one’s not cute enough” or “that one’s so hot. I want her”. We say that for every second girl and half of the time they aren’t as pretty as the last. I am not generalizing but the way I have seen, when a girl goes like “He’s cute”, the guy’s actually quite cute. I assure you I am straight. Also they don’t go calling 10 guys cute in the same day, we do that not them. I admit it on behalf of them. Both sides have exceptional people too who go on a mature and advanced category. That’s like the best possible thing I can say to maintain equality at the moment.

A guy needs to stop thinking like a sleuth, think twisted or treat it like a game of chess cause truly that complicates things. It’s only that hard to understand cause you aint taking the simple route. If you want a girl just go and ask her out, like seriously go and say “Can I ask you out?”. If you think she’s cute tell her “You’re cute.”. Stop worrying because she’ll only think you a bit mad at the most. Personal experience bros. Even if you just want to hook up man, dude even they think about it. You know it and I sure as hell know it. Don’t beat about the bush man, it’s less bothersome. Slick words be real smooth but even awkward is cute, each to their own set of people. A person feels better when the other person just states what they want clearly and honestly, it’s easier for them to decide, again clearly and honestly. If you can be straightforward, whether you get her not, she definitely isn’t gonna seem complicated. You just got to be not afraid of not catching a few fish. And for all you know the girl you think is cute might think you’re the same after some of the intentional or unintentional cool acts you pull sometimes.

Trust me on this: No matter who you are, there’s always a handful of the opposite gender who harbor a crush on you for at least a month.

What type of girl likes what type of guys or vice versa is like a secondary phase, a second class pronoun. Both genders have their present characteristic differences because of the way the other one acts.

 

 

Linguistic Differences

What is language?

Or what is a language?

Well I’d clearly say that “Language is an intellectual form that we use for the purpose of communication. It is how we get the result of our brainwaves to perfectly reach other people.”

That was the logical and scientific way of putting it.

Now that we have the introduction out of the way let’s go into more detail shall we?

Language is pretty much anything that used for communication. It’s not just talking, silence is also a language.

Basically verbal is not the only method, non-verbal being perfectly possible. We can communicate through body language and without any words, in other words “silence”.

However today I am not here to explain communication or tell you about its types. What I am going to discuss today is regarding what my question was about: Language.

The word “Language” simply brings to mind the reference to a particular language such as English, French, Spanish, Dutch, Russian, German, and so on.

Damn! There are so many different languages. We’ve really outdone ourselves. Every language can be translated into other simpler or more complex languages. Every one of them have their twists, their unique way of using the tongue, and separate rules which make them so.

To be honest perhaps I should start using the word “linguistics” before I go any further so you all find it easier to understand I am not covering the page about what’s already most obvious to you.

The fact that there is a science, specific regulations, a psychological method with which every language is performed brings in the concept of linguistics.

There are people who speak more than one language. If their brain and tongue become home to more than four the person is termed as a super linguist.

I should probably try to communicate my point as to take towards the different direction which is why we’re here today.

Well as I said, the concept of languages are different. Each language hence brings in a different feeling in the same dialogue. Saying “I love you” English brings a certain effect. Now try saying the same in French: “Je t’aime”. Now let’s try Hindi: “Main tumse pyaar karta hoon”. They not only sound different but also feel different. Patriotism and regional love aside this is quite true if you honestly think about it.

You could perhaps say the beauty of the flower is perhaps on a different level. What level that you decide. The essence and feeling delivered feels different especially if you take a third person point of view. I know what you’re going to say: you’re repeating things again.

Basically they bring in their own sense which are the results of their own unique cultures, and mentalities. With every language comes the way of thinking of the place it’s from. A person who travels a lot and hence meets a lot of people will definitely know this, so will a guy or gal in show business. I mean not only when it comes to love, it can be anything. Language affects the level of the magic. I think comedians who’ve faced their share of bad shows will understand a bit better especially those who’ve done tours across many countries. The success of jokes always depend on language and culture to a great extent. There are other factors too but I have decided to not digress too much today.

So now you have a new and different perspective when you’re perhaps travelling the world, of course telling a joke, or even when asking for a condom.

 

 

 

 

This Time You Realize

You know sometimes you’re living a day of great fun, filled with food, booze and girls or boys, and it goes as fast as a roadrunner with you simultaneously wondering how it did and wishing there was more time. Other times you’re just living a life filled with despair, boredom, annoyances, basically misery and you wonder how it goes so slow as well as when will it end. You kind of wish for the weekend to come so you can cuddle with your bed instead of having to embrace the cheap tricks. Time is an entity that betrays you every time if you think about it and it’s kind of ironic when people tell you that you don’t give it too much value. If you think about it quite frankly, every decision we have made and are going to make has been the wrong one or is therefore going to be a wrong one. Time has affected it and has forever been quite harsh, we’ve just forever taken it lightly. You never get enough time to enjoy and get the most amount of time to repent for not having got it. To be completely honest it is because I value time which is why I know how hard it is. I would say that if you truly value something, it is then that you begin having the patience to analyze it and fish out it’s flaws.

One of my previous crushes, I would always give her chocolates with a lily. One day she told me that it’s getting quite old and that it wouldn’t work because she didn’t feel the same way. She asked why even while knowing that I kept going on with the gesture. I smiled and told her that I loved to see that happiness she got in getting something so simple. She got much more expensive and flashier stuff from others but from my present made her give a genuine smile. “Well thank you but you can stop now. It’s getting old too. Also you know I love roses too so why always lilies?” she said. “Well it’s because when I give you roses you like the gesture but have nothing to say. When I give you lilies you always speak about what you don’t like about it but how it’s a type of flower you still like. You give it enough importance to analyze it.”. We’ve been quite close ever since.

Some people might have the notion that it is not time that is fast or slow, it is we who are always slower. Let’s just say that in my case, old grandfather clock has never really been with me. He treasures this grandson quite on the down side. You can actually feel the difference because of it. You have so many phrases related to the subject of time but have you wondered how we’ve never gone past it’s trivial meaning?

                                          “It’s not the time”                       “Time up!”

“This time I will!”                         “Time to go.”

 

There are many more phrases like these that seem completely unrelated. The fact is that we never go past the passing remark and see how time truly does wait for no one. Even that phrase is taken quite casually. It’s really never your time and time isn’t ever up, your chance has just passed. You can never rely on an external entity, trust me when I say this: Each of them betrays you every time. We all technically want to have the life of our dreams to come true and wait for the correct time, trust me the flower ain’t blooming without you watering it every day. It’s not about the time, it’s about your time.

Well speaking of my own time, that’s where the flower’s already bloomed quite well but it’s dying quickly and now time is of the essence.

Thoughts of a Comic

Nowadays we have so many types of definitions to what actually is referred to as comedy. The real funny thing is how people basically think of it as telling a joke whereas we live now in times where comedy itself has a great amount of history and current affairs. Economics can also come in if you technically want to term the statistics regarding which comic is the most sellable and which type is sold the most and so on. To be honest if you think about it, comedy is used to tell people things they otherwise would not have listened to. We use it to make topics interesting and refrain people from showing us how loud they can snore.

A comic doesn’t need to necessarily take help of a joke to make a person laugh. There’s comic acting, improvisation and narration to name types apart from jokes. There is a difference between a comedian and a comic actor. A comedian tells you jokes while a comic actor says things funny. A comedian will tell you “Let me tell you the best part about me giving her that nice red dress. She gets 3 things out of it. One: the dress, two: the jealousy from the neighbors, and three: when she sees one of her friends wearing the same colored dress she gets to shout Oh my gosh! You tooo!! Ahahahaaa!!”. A comic actor however will go like “I wish. I had. Meryl Streep’s hair. So I could have scared my deadly foes indeed.” in William Shatner’s voice or just be like “Being someone famous, you smile at em and they keep sniggering at you for the next hour. And one of them’s always gonna have his bloody mouth open, start drooling. I’m like What do want now, a cookie?”.

Now the fact about this subject is that even if you have separate types, you don’t have a specific rulebook that says the respective types are restricted to themselves so basically the real comedy comes in the form of mixtures. A joke in itself on a basic level is you asking a question which the other person or audience can rarely answer unless of course there are mind readers among every bunch coming to watch some standup. Similarly a narration is in this case basically telling a funny story. It in itself is a type that is common when you’re basically talking with your close amigos and attentive compadres. You just have to know how to be random.

Most comics in the past as well as in the present rely a lot on jokes. The best of the best however have always relied on total improvisation and will continue to. Take people like Rickles, Seinfeld, Robin Williams, Ellen Degeneres, and Jim Carrey to name of the greats.

Usually if you’re into the funny business you basically realize two things, first is that you can never stick to one type when doing a show and secondly to always drink some good cold coffee before you come up. There are so many genres that have surfaced over the years namely loose comedy, mean comedy, sarcastic humor, etc. Even though everyone tries their hand in doing everything, every comic has their individual style and their style reflects only one genre.

If you look at history as well as present then one has to admit how superior sarcastic humor and mean comedy is. However not every place and hence not everyone accepts it. That’s one of the main things which make comedy so tiresome. Trust me if you didn’t already know let me just tell you that making someone laugh is way harder than making someone cry. This is not only because of the negativity vs positivity concept. It has to do with the fact that what hurts someone and gives that person pain will never get old. A joke however gets old. Also a joke which is funny to your friend might not be that funny to your sister.

People need to start learning how to differentiate between making fun and insulting because they both sound and are phrased differently. Also people need to be able to take comedy to it’s actual extent and not take anything seriously when it is going on because that is what you’re supposed to do at that particular time, have fun.