What if

What if what is right is actually wrong and what is beyond wrong is actually right?

What if what is, is not it and when we die we wake up? Yes! What if what we see and feel right now is just an illusion, an illusion which keeps us from seeing the truth as it is. What if all the flash of colours, the innumerable rainbows, even those sudden matching t-shirts. All of them, what if one day when you close your eyes and stop, suddenly you open them and see that what was wasn’t anything and what is, is something that would make you feel shocked or in other words complicated. That’s just the subtle way of putting it.

But….but but let us say this world, this truth or let’s just say “this figment of imagination which we right now cannot imagine which also can deny most if not all of what already exists, is a happy one.”

Now you might be wondering that what am I saying? Now what if what we’re saying right now, what we’re thinking or going to think is just part of a program that keeps us going in this particular sequence. This particular order of events, all the numerous possibilities which our steps can result to as well as all the steps that are possible then become fixed.

That moment when you realize that they keep on coming, the innumerable thoughts, is the moment you begin to question the concept of right and wrong. Random thoughts, specific thoughts, implicated thoughts, obvious thoughts,swaying thoughts. Thoughts, thoughts and thoughts. These thoughts are that which make you think of a question and what makes you think of which question to think about.

That’s exactly how you question “what if” regarding anything and everything that happened and is going to happen.

So what if all of this is all false? The truth is not the truth. The lie is something apart from a lie. What if what a lie means isn’t what it actually means?

What if….

The First Time

The day when you saw her the first time. The first one obviously. The second one is beautiful, smart, pleasurable and great too but we all know that thing about the first.

Well the situation usually starts with something like this:

“I love her okay!! Noone look at her until I break up with her after I get her or I am over her after I don’t. So what I do now? Oh wait I told you not to look sorry. First order cancelled. Look at her like anything but that and tell me what to do.”

Okay perhaps I am kidding, that happens with me more. Okay! Okay! just me.

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Now let’s say it takes a few……okay let’s not be too subtle. Lots of moments of peril and finally you get that perfect moment where chances are greater.

Now the grand moment that all of you have been yearning for. The moment when he finally says it. Like the idiot finally stops dawdling around and ruining the climatic moments every time with a ridiculous excuse or temporary plot change.

“I love you”

“You really mean a lot to me.”

“I like you a lot.”

Whichever lines or paragraphs it may have been. Point is, it was utterly romantic. And now:

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“Yes! I love you too.”

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Dammit! Tears of pride and joy! Oh my god! Can you feel the happiness and hear some extremely romantic song playing?

Beautiful! A sight to see. They kiss. They cuddle. Years go by as it gets serious. Their love takes them to the next level.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I give you babies!

For legal purposes, they venture into the marriage court.

“Bro you have a great life. Beautiful wife, a cute kid and a happy marriage”

Okay so that was one life. Another is they break up before the next level.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the period of enlightenment.

Either via problems or it’s on mature terms. Let’s choose the latter in the next life.

We realize that it was special irrespective of whether it’s gone or if it stayed, it was the “first time” and nothing beats it. The cough from your first sip of vodka, the first time you fell on the ground, the other first time and yes, your first kiss. The second doesn’t come close.

Now if you didn’t get her, that’s a very long, and depressing story for a day we’ll devote to crying.

P.S. If they break up like after fifteen-sixteen years of marriage, let’s just say that happens too but they both know how much of worth their first time was.

 

Stating the Obvious

Life is a genre that contains all genres. That’s something obvious.

Let’s state something even more obvious, the generation of today can survive a day without water but cannot survive an hour without wifi. Wireless connection is god man.

Wifi is the reason the Phileas Fogg of 2016 can travel around the world in eight seconds while staying at home and wont need to waste 69,11,992 seconds more travelling outside.

In certain countries if you don’t speak the language they speak, shouting “Help!!” will only get you the answer that translates to “Hi!”.

Here’s another obvious thing, your female crush who speaks in the same language as you is harder to understand than your little pet dog who speaks in bowwow language.

Since we are carrying on with this, let’s all face another obvious thing. Some people might just skip words in this passage or have actually taken the time to understand why it was 69,11,992. Some people might have just escaped from reading uptil here altogether.

The obvious thing is that everything is so obvious that it’s actually complicated, and when you realize that, you obviously would be so angry that you laugh instead of crying which has become an obvious reaction nowadays.

Now let me tell you things that aren’t too obvious, for example there would be no way to understand if the writer of a certain passage or essay is starving for the last 6 hours, high on coffee or in the mood to do some push-ups unless he chooses to give a literary hint. The fact that a person teaching history doesn’t like Akbar.

It’s all unexpectedly hard to foresee but chances being true are obvious.

Now let me ask you one of the least obvious questions in the world:

“Are you sleepy right now?”

If you are then I really don’t want to know why.

Isn’t that obvious?

 

A Strong Bond

The first time I saw you
I don’t remember when or how
but can I forget that face?
The face of someone who cared
The face of someone who touched my heart
A person who laughed and smiled
and brought me my life’s first happiness
Even a forgetful person such as me
cannot forget the moments we spent together
Even an irresponsible kid such as me
cannot forget the time spent during a bad weather

The first time we met, it was at school
For the first 5 days I remember
how I would only long to talk with you but not try
When I told you that afterwards
you laughed and then said “what a fool!”
I remember those talks we had in class during breaks
Short and sweet to me they were
many times irrelevant to you
so you used to simply not care
and then help make it more fun
I remember when we used to play together
The 30 mins after school, and during breaks
We were like two young lion cubs
Playful, cheerful and most of all
we were really really close
cause you had made a home
in one of my heart’s inner rooms

After many years one day I was sitting
When you suddenly said “Hi” to me
I clearly wasn’t expecting that
and neither was I expecting you to remember
cause we hadn’t seen or talked for 7 years
My heart gave a joyful smile
while for her, even her face did
We talked and talked like old times
while speaking in the past tense
We carried on giggling while taking turns to say
“As usual you make no sense”
I felt a strong bond even now
It bloomed with perfection

We were two puzzle pieces, meant to be together
The only difference is we are older
and we don’t chirp like little birds anymore
I thank the lord for making it so
or the day wouldn’t have gone so good that day
The day when I realized what a “bond” truly means
The day when I realized what “treasuring” is

Now it seemed like we had a sense of affection
Even if sometimes she showed no signs of caring
If nothing else, we did truly have a strong connection
A connection no one can break
It’ll make us stronger
We walk in our own little lawn
It’ll tie us together
As our Friendship hopes to carry on

This is Goodbye

The feeling
of withering away
like a helpless flower
sitting in a dark corner on the edge
Am I truly gonna go back there?
Is this really the end of my beginning?
Tears make no difference
I have to leave
I am not strong enough
I have failed them
I am so not tough

No I refuse to believe
but deep inside I don’t want to suffer
There are many who I am going to leave
I will miss them so much
I am only kidding myself
The idiots will never forgive me
They will drag me back again
Am I being heartless towards them?
They are going to punish me real bad
after they bring me back
However I wish I could’ve done more
From everything that’s raged, I feel so sore
I’m slowly losing my will
my consciousness is fading
No!! I must get up
I can’t lose hope

I spit out my negativity
Is this really the color
that marks my end
Red!!
The color  of the necklace she wore
If I could but see her face once more
But I can’t let her see me like this
There are some things she has to miss
(sniggers) They are all idiots
but I guess so am I
(sighh) I guess this is Goodbye

Let it Be: A Tribute

This is something I wrote after some good coffee and a cover of the song. Want to dedicate this to Paul and angela vasquez who sang his song so well

Why do we try?

Why do we even cry?

When there’s no end….no help

The fact that it goes on and on without stop

The little boy needs help

But there is none

Let suffering go to everyone

 

Situation is out of control

He takes a knife

So he can say bye to the endless strife

He is going to take the painful stroll

Towards painlessness

He wants to imagine an end

But he treads towards a place where there is no imagination

He wants to take a long sleep

So that never again he has to weep

The endless cries, from a distance the reaper sees

Time to enter the void

He’s waiting with a smile

 

“When the broken hearted people living in the world agree”

There will be an answer, “You shall be free”

“Though they may be parted there is still a chance that they will see”

There will be hope, believe, “let it be”

 

As the he turned in question

The heart now did see.

With tears he saw, it was she

 

In his hour of darkness she’s standing right in front of him

Telling him everything wasn’t so dim

“Speaking words of wisdom. Let it be”

After a long time, the truth he did see

 

Now with his smile he faces the darkness

“When the night is clouded there is still a light that shines on me”

He takes a step, puts his arms around the shadow

With love, “It’s okay now, let it be”

The Twist of It

Life is like a headache. It’s immensely painful but with some aspirin you can be free of the unbearable feeling that it gives. In life one must find that aspirin and always keep it with oneself. But like every wise person, he must also try prevention first.

The crazy thing is you always need an antidote but you always know that prevention should be taken into account. Cough syrup is for the danger when it arrives but boosting one’s immunity by giving importance to the right sustenance is needed too.

The fact is that life is a paradox where nothing really makes sense which is the only thing that actually makes sense. Make sense?

All you need to go through life is to either not try to understand it and reason with it or try to fight back and control it.

However believe it or not the true answer is neither. The actual procedure is to let go and be unaffected.

If that’s not right then what has all those sayings regarding no one helping anyone but themselves and your biggest enemy is yourself taught you?

The idea is not to use the one that’s right, but the one that works.

The straight point is that life is twisted and you have to find a twist that works for you, which might be taking the twist with a straight face or straight on looking at the problem with a twisted smile.

That’s the twist of it.

 

The Tale of Two Warriors: Win and Loss

Speaking of two warriors, this was the result when two minds decided to work together

There the two stand
Waiting to start
Like a race, it is
To begin the first part
They begin with the show of respect
Continues with that of enmity
Each one does truly expect
That he’ll win with dignity
Loss is what they must accept
Cause it isn’t what they choose
At times unfair means are not correct
Honor still lies, even if you lose

When a fight is a battle
Then there must lie unearthly will
For to save the loved from their demise
There must be an intent to kill
Wits are truly what keeps you alive
Even when you’re supposed to be dying
Power is something that can always arrive
But Strength truly helps when you’re crying
There are times when you must cheat
When having no choice, there’s only one way to save
Without fail, the enemy must face defeat
To kill your friends, the choice is grave
What lies in the end is bitter happiness
What lies beneath is the sorrow
The sight but causes utter sadness
For to those there is no tomorrow

Now from the two only one does stand
There are joyful times even when both can
What started with respect ends with respect on this land
The endless courage lies during their lifespan

Noone like You

With hair like tender silk
Eyes like black diamonds
She walks this earth
As a blessing to those who know her
And a loss to those who don’t
When you but see her smile
You can but notice a certain feeling
That comes over you

It is so warm and fuzzy
That it makes you smile when you’re sad
Cause she is so utterly sweet
That you cant even hope to feel bad
When she talks, its as if she’s singing
Doesn’t matter how silly her thoughts are
You still feel your heart to be ringing

The way she gently caresses her hair
When she feels like looking even more cute
The way she joyously looks at you
When you bring her food

The way you feel
When you see her cry
If it’s because of me
I’d rather die
She is so lucky
To have so many who care
She is so  beautiful that
Finding someone like her is rare

I will always fail to get her
No matter how I try
Still no matter what I’ll still hope
That she doesn’t say “Goodbye”
To her I have many things I wanna say
But right now I’ll just say “I love you”
For her I have many things I wanna do
I will cause “There’s no-one like you”

Love’s last letter

 

Dear love of my life,

You know you’re too important to me. You always have. You always will be. You refuse to answer as it’s the polite fashion. The safe way. “It’s ok”

The sound of your silence is better than that of your “No”. Perhaps that would hit ten times as much.

However I miss the frequent awkwardness that I caused. Your occasional bloom, and especially those white shiny teeth. Those occasional free periods alone with you was bliss. Aiming to get you to not say “I’m bored” was like attempting to answer a chemistry question correctly without having studied. I hadn’t. The constant exercise I got when getting your troubles to go away. Those phone calls too.

I know even you cherish some of them, especially getting ice cream while angering my wallet.

But now as 10 years have gone by and you’re sitting with your little darling Emma, I lie under a grave waiting to meet you next time,

and tell you in a different way that

“I really want it to last longer.”

Your’s Lovingly

A loving soldier